':Cue' and 'A': A cute litte kitty with no practical purpose

Have you ever wanted to read the barcode behind your retina because you think you are part of a secret government cloning conspiracy? Do you have a hard time figuring out that the Price Chopper website is http://www.pricechopper.com? Are you the kind of person who thinks a Search Engine is used to find lost trains? Have you ever said to yourself "ya' know…I don't see nearly enough advertisements in my average day"? Then Digital Convergence has the product for you.

The Cue Cat is a long, white plastic device that looks similar to a cat that has swallowed a stoplight, getting ready to pounce. The red glow emitted from its throat is caused by a laser that scans standard bar codes and special "cues" to read the product information. As for the software, it is packaged on one CD and will alert you to any updates that may become available. Digital Convergence recently unleashed this new "toy" on the unsuspecting public of America. The Cue Cat hit the market on August 29th, 2000 at RadioShacks across the nation. Anyone who wanted one of these new and seemingly useful devices could just walk into their local Radio Shack and get one for free. For free!!! What kind of company just gives away a revolutionary product like this, you ask? A company that doesn't get its returns from the consumer, but from the advertisement industry, that's what kind.

The Cat itself has a very cute, aesthetically pleasing look to it, and its red light is a very nice complement to the four or five green lights that most computers have on all the time. Unfortunately, that is where the usefulness of this product stops. The instructions tell you to line up the barcode with the cat's "mouth" and make slow, even swiping motions to get the proper effect. In reality, it is relatively hard to get it to read, and it works best if done in a fast, if not furious back and forth motion.

The actual hardware device is connected to a computer's keyboard port. This is because the software takes the information from the barcode, enters the appropriate key strokes into the database, receives the correct product web page, and enters the proper keystrokes in the address window to bring you to the website. Want to have some fun? Open an I.M. window and then scan something with the Cue Cat. It inputs a string of gibberish and then sends it.

As for the software, I don't know anyone who would enjoy having a bar half an inch high running the length of his or her screen. Despite that, the software installed cleanly and with no noticeable conflicts but also does not have an uninstall file. Also, the program requires a registration code in order to be used; this code can be obtained free by registering on-line. A minor annoyance, I'll agree, but who wants a company affiliated with Radio Shack, the store that wants your phone number for everything, to have his/her e-mail address?

The newest added feature of the Cue Cat is a compatibility with your T.V. With a cable, you can now connect your computer to your T.V. and watch a new dimension of Cue compatible commercials. With this connection, commercials on T.V. will send your computer to the proper web page. You can now watch commercials in stereo! This may be the most useless feature a product has ever advertised.

So why, you may ask, do you need one of these products? The correct answer is that you don't. This is the biggest new device to try and make us want products we don't need or care about. The only people to whom I would recommend this product would be engineers who just want to take it apart and play with the pieces. This definitely tops my list of Christmas gift to not give. You are all entitled to your own opinions, but don't say I didn't warn you.