Greek Corner

Alpha Chi Rho

This corner is really gonna suck. We have absolutely nothing to write about. Let's see: the Postulants tried to wipe their cumulative duffs in the cellar stairwell, Tori nibbled on the bone Jose gave her, the best thing about watching the Super Bowl was those Budweiser frogs, Joey retired his best friend since childhood [left hand] , whitey picked up the soap after giving his girlfriend a pearl necklace, Jimmy was so chemically imbalanced Saturday he couldn't even get a "hat"-on, Alex became the pinball wizard, Nate is still sleeping, Andy got a date [1-900-YOURMOM], Tom is halfway through his popcorn, Brad got married to his jailmate Bubba, Foster hasn't pulled the pin, Anus still wants to fondle Swallow, Pres. Strauss still hasn't canceled his Columbia House XXX Video Account, the cook still burns the f-n gravy, -where's the darn TP, Stewart went 24 hours without asking anyone to abuse... I mean borrow their car and he went 5 minutes without denting his, kuiawa still hasn't mastered yaking correctly [maybe he should ask gaebe for the proper methods], Jackson is still confused about which way to point his car in the Sumner Tunnel, Dave came out of his "room" for Groundhog's Day [No, he didn't see his shadow], and Luke well... that about wraps it up.

If anything else happened, remember one important thing: It was probably Bob's fault!!!

AGD

You cannot hide forever A7D-we'll find you!! Why does this school spend so much money on renovations, when all that's needed is a few hundred chalk AGD's to brighten up campus! Pledges, you did great-almost good enough to make up for those broken shoelaces! A special welcome to our new pledges: Paula Brezniak (Happy Birthday too!), Sarah Furey, Kellie Popp, & Kendra Stillwell! Congrats also to the P.W.'s: Sarah T. & Jen S. and the S.W.'s Carrie & KP! A big hug goes out to Karen L! Our fearless leader, Kim, is flying the friendly skies-what a good sport you are! Big thank you's to our pledges and LXA for Tues, and to ATO for another great social! Is there a problem with pictures falling off the walls in the house? Maybe Karen G. is responsible...she was the first to have a heart on ya know...Got a goat yet Karen? The Winter Carnival is this weekend, and we're a shoo-in for the egg heave thanks to Delucs! Also, Cindy&Mindy's last home game is Sat at 2:00-better go! Officer Interests are due tomorrow-don't forget or...PHT! ADOVELING!

Hey AGD Pledges! Thanks to ATO for Friday! Hope all of the sisters enjoyed the scavenger hunt on Tuesday- even though it was so cold! Kim- you were a great kidnappee!! Thanks to the Lambda Chi's for your participation and the social. Congrats to all of those who did the planning- it was great!! Juniors- thanks for the tootsie rolls and stars! Thanks to Jen K, Laura, Erin and Deb T for the brownies. We had a great time on Thursday night chalking up the campus!! Good show of unity girls- we all had plenty of things for each other. Good luck to Mia and Deb F- we'll miss you. Hope everyone did well on the FE test! Have a great week. Adoveling!

FIJI

Since I didn't get one in last week this one will be better. Pete, which one is it the new moonface or the buffet. Giorgi, how are the killer bees. Kijak, I hear Tyson needs an opponent. Speaking of Thunder I hear there are permanent clouds from Lisbon staying over Goves room. Dano give me all your money. Hey hendrickson "your all lower body" Toby how was Lisa . Cyr don't worry, only 10 more months. Aw yeah primetime, how was JL. Pledges hang in there, not that much longer.

Lambda Chi Alpha

The first annual Cross and Crescent Bowl was a blowout. Coach D led his team to a stunning 21-0 victory. Tyler, get some sun glasses. Cioffi lost twice since he was drafted by the losers. Sweetah, sorry about the make-over and the hog-ties. At least red is your color. In intramural sports, the KAGL bowling team is still undefeated and untied. Hey guys, why don't you get Jeevan to join the bowling team? Rumor has it that his score was 14 going into the tenth. Pretty sad. The KAGL basketball team won by forfeit this week. The other team was too scared to show up. I'm sure all you guys paid your dues. Yeah, Right. Mr. Minasian, the Beavis and Butt-head half time show rocked. Gotta go.

Phi Sigma Sigma

Hey Phi Sig Sigs!

All aboard the Phi Sig Sig train! First off, I'd like to congratulate ALL of the NEW MEMBERS who are now sisters!! You guys did it! We are all so proud of you guys, we love you all!

Standing O's go out to Jen Rice, Sarah Tegan, Laura Bielitz, Jen Adams, and the rest of the New Member Committee! All your hard work is most DEFINATELY appreciated! You all did great jobs!

Congrats goes out to the new Panhel executives: President- Lee Blouin, Activities- Dwalin May, Treasurer- Ann Sbriglio.

Good luck to all of the winter sports teams! We hope to see everyone in Harrington this Saturday for SPIRIT DAY. Come show your support....the action starts at 2:00 when the women's basketball team takes on Clark.

Thanks goes out to TKE for hosting our festivities last Friday night. It was really nice of you guys! Everyone had a blast!

In the personals this week: good news everyone...the sequel to Flashdance, appropriately called FLASHDANCE 2, comes out in the fall and it stars none other than Tricia Pignone! She's a welder by day, a provocative dancer by night, and she shoots a mean jump shot! Kelly King....sorry about Harry; I thought he was doing an interpretive dance when he was floating on his back! V-Neck, shouldn't the garbage disposal be able to digest a 2 foot cup? Lynno, thanks for coming out with us and letting your wild side beam through last week! New Member Class....thanks for the get-together two weeks ago: we all learned an important lesson...cookies don't fit as well as one dollar bills!

CONGRATS NEW SISTERS!! WE LOVE YA! LITP

Sigma Alpha Epsilon

I would like to thank Phi Sig Sig for coming to our annual trash the president's room social. I also hope everyone had a good time at the beach party.

The A-team basketball team continues to roll on, followed by the aweful tag team of Melissa Ong Majowick and the limp pollack in table tennis.

I leave you this week with a list of the top ten predictions for 1995 10. In a fit of rage, Teak goes on a 20 day drinking binge. 9. Dufort and Petro are caught role playing in the room 1 playhouse. 8. Crazy, POND, enough said. 7. Lemur finds out that he is allergic to roses. 6. Thanks to his roommate, Stubert becomes an amateur film maker. 5. Toole and Basl find a new sport, Baseball. Anyone up for a game of pitch and catch? 4. Philly becomes DD. 3. Sully finds a new hobby and stays away from the house. 2. George finds that there is nothing better than a night on the sea _____. 1. Mun gets amnesia and forgets that he is a clepto.

Till next week.

Five Apples

Sigma Pi

Well, Half a term done. Not much happened at all this week except maybe that Len Potato Head asked forgiveness for his sins. Midterms for the maggots delayed their washing of pots an pans. Chunts are about every day of the week, so I'll be around the house you can be sure. I did get a letter for scholarship with some ideas for motivating people to work hard, study, and be good guys: 1) Post a bulletin saying "Be the BEST of Whatever You Are, Be a bright and shining star!!" 2) A word of the week to be posted on the bathroom door. 3) A board for students who have written excellent movie and book reviews. 4) Give students who get A's balloons. 5) Make students sign contracts that says they must study so many hours a week. 6) Make students write positive mental attitude cards at beginning of term. For quiet hours: 1) Have roommates rotate as quiet hour monitors. 2) Have 24 hour quiet hours during midterms, the week before finals and the week of. 3) Make it courtesy hours instead of quiet hours. (the 'be nice to your neighbors'' hour)

And last of all, because we live in Mister Roger's neighborhood, why can't we all just get along?

TKE

In the tradition of Spam and for lack of better opening lines, "hey jerkies." This week's guest writer is the Mmmmmmmmmmm Yeaaaaaahhhh guy from the third deck otherwise known as the Feels Monster and thanks to the disgruntled Jew for saving the corner. First off, the "smooth move" award of the week goes out to Linus, Jailbait, and Raabi for their creation of the Decade Club. I never knew that Alex Trebek could be so biased (Mitch and Miah)? Thanks to Rudy, TKE officially has three colors: Cherry, Gray, and SILVER? Thanks to Phi Sigma Sigma for the awesome time Friday night. (?) Mmmmmmmmmmmm Yeaaaaaaaaahhh! Gotta love those twinkies.

Who would have guessed that the Wild West would see snow. My boots and hat was all sopped up with da white rain like stuff and my belt buckle waz all rusted up. Time's running out, keep looking for those dates, if you hook up with Cobra you could be in with the burnout tapes. Bonus! Way to go everybody, the stag table is looking bleak this year. Hey Kei, I need a key, can I borrow ten bucks? How 'bout an I.O.U.? Fitz wins the Pulitzer Prize with an essay on religion, and ethics condoning fluid intake. This week start getting in shape for the intramural swim meet like right now! Good luck to Gyro even though you'll read this after the weekend meet. No wonder you're so good with the ladies; it's because you're event is the breaststroke. New kid on the block, the son of Spam, aka Emilio. His afro is preserved and currently on display in the chapter room for all those interested. Remember, the fifty yard line is the place to be! "Bobby, I luv you" -Mez.

Zeta Psi

First things first...a much deserved congratulations goes out to our fifteen new brothers: Jason Kipp, Fred Hervey, Jeff Cullens, David Smiley, Bob Grelotti, Aaron Korthis, Rob Keogh, Steve Siegmund, Ryan Abraham, Craig Howitt, Mike Gagne, Tim McGilvreay, Mike Olivieri, James Desmaries, and Greg Sheeler. Good job, fellas...So, the new strategy to get Lucas to finish his MQP-constant ridicule from the neophytes...More signs that the world is coming to an end: 5.Eternal Pledge Boy, Steve Siegmund, now a brother...4. Larry Montague, vanishing man, has been spotted at the house several times this week...3.Noxious fumes emitted by mug monster found to cure cancer...2.Matt Deyette, working man, not sitting around on his butt...1.Snow in Worcester, I don't believe it. Welcome to Hell, Baby!!...Speaking of the Apocalypse, do I hear the 4 horses of the apocalypse or is that the neophytes trying to sing...So, Nick, I guess the word subtle is not in your vocab, Fred:"Hi, Nick, you're not in this class.", Nick:"I know."...Party and social comin up...Jail-N-Bail comin' soon...as for me, as the pledges would say, I don't care, I'm gettin'....Signing Off-Jabba

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