Greek Corner
Alpha Chi Rho
Yikes, we're already half way through this term - I still have a lot more drinking to do. Easter was great I hear: a few stories circulating were that on the way to Pennsylvania Geriatric Park and Bob-o (what a lame nickname?) got lost and ended up in a bar for men (Politically correct) in Pittsburgh (shellfish can sure relate to that), Jose's Dad tried to get a drunken Easter version game of Hai-Li (spelling's wrong, sue me), and I hear to sloshed mountaineers got taken in by ranger rick for disturbing the peace on the mountaintop. A note to Tony: don't forget to attend your own meeting this week. Hey, I'm not kidding - this is my job!
BTW, grad app day is approaching rapidamente and i hear they are eagerly awaiting the festivities planned. Uh, that would include mass consumption of fermented hops and for those lighter partiers, a rousing parchesi tournament. Disclaimer: don't allow screaming, psychopathic, raving, lunatics, in the ATM. Dates, you got 'em yet, heard Mrs. G was available. Yes, the truck is done - Hasta proxima semana! -TRICK
Alpha Tau Omega
Team Feta wasn't at the showing this week but Team Wasted was. Yes, you guessed it. Fresh and Podo were the new beirut champs this past week. Shea and Morin are homesick and fat. I believe the fat part. The English version of space mountain. Gobis(aka pink eye) is offially done. What's up dude? Brendan and Letterman, problems. Freshman are the most likely to drink themselves to oblivion. Budha, what year are you? McDonut nothing happened, right? Socials are doing a kick ass job with parties. Ooh yeah. Nikolaou and I got some of guys to try the drink of the old country. Powered by ouzo. (Greek)
FIJI
Hello everyone. Its time to get back to the old type greek corners because when I was a sophomore.... Anyways, the news this week is that Palmer is trying to get a patent on his invention of the 100 ft. mechanical arm. He says that it will allow him to pin the girl he loves without breaking the law. In other thunderous news, Gove has been asked to appear on Saturday night live "according to him" after his interview with the saturday night live cast. Yeah right, rice, keeping telling yourself its jock itch and it had nothing to do with last weekend. Zeke has come out with his new fashion line of tighty whities to impress the girls who come to our house. According to him tighter is better but I hope that included in his line is a set that works like depends in case he has another accident. Seal don't you know you have to be awake to make a million dollars. News flash. Alan Assner has a girlfriend. Alan Assner has a girlfriend. Alan Assner has a girlfriend. If he was smart he would go try to play the lottery too. In case people were wondering were OB has been, the 2nd floor quad has traded him to the E room for a player to be named later. Congratulations to Smitty for pinning sweet jade and making his prediction made earlier in the year come true. Glad to see Minko is never sour. Well got to cut this one short but before I go here is a swammi for you. Swammi says, "Ranucci, Simpson, and the day greasy al gets a job" "The greatest ever, whipped more than ever, and never"
Lambda Chi Alpha
Hope everyone had a happy Easter. Congrats to Rob Shivitz and James Lovering for being named president and vice-president of the Physics society. Maybe now you guys can figure out how fast Butler was going when he hit the wall. I'd like to introduce our new social chair, Mr. Bill Goode. Good luck, I can't wait till our next party! The intramural hockey team is still undefeated. We're taking the Stanley Cup this year. Hey guys the white rose formal is comming up. Everyone's got dates already right? Thanks to all the bigs and littles for the great job on the project. It will look great wherever we put it. Keep an eye out on the quad and at the Greendale mall for the Lambda Chi \ AGD teeter-toter a thon for juvenile diabetes and St. Jude's childrens hospital. If ya can help us out with some donations. Happy April fool's day to Tony and Jeevan. That's it for me I'm outa here. Feets
Theta Chi
From the second half of the greek corner dynamic duo...I'll start off with congrats to all those new exec guys. Just remember that the new prez is merely a figurehead for the true ruler...Ass Kitchen Steward. In weekly world news, there have been numerous H.O.U.S.(Hog of Unusual Size) sightings in France. And if England has any more of those crazy cows, they can send 'em here...Haig'll take care of them. On the local front...hey Phil, see what happens when you feed her beer? The B&E boys were out in full force again this week-lock up your fridges! Da'Loser should be concentrating on getting some respectable hair instead of a respectable room next year...talk to Mudd for some ideas. Rupp-try and set up some kind of recycling program with Mosier to take care of all those wasted trees. And find out what the going rate on scrap metal is...say about two or tree harmonicas' worth. I can't hear you-I've been physically abused in the ear. In business news, EBA has awarded the renovation contract to Drunken Twigboy Demolition Inc. Hey, the job's half done. Stock up on jellybeans this weekend...that's the only food you'll be getting when you get back. Unless we start reaping the benefits of those squirrel/canman snares by the dumpsta. Yahoo for meat and potatoes! And finally, in the world of sports...if not showing up for IM games is cool, consider zete Miles Davis. Glad I could help brighten up your Stuesday...
Zeta Psi
Well, here we all in the middle of midterms once again. 4 more weeks to go till sunshine and freedom. Here's 5 tips to help pass the time: 5) Glue your eyes to the TV, and drain your brain. 4) Sing the the Smurf song, till you become delirious. 3) Erect a totem pole. 2) Fall into a time warp!!! You might never get out? 1) Drink a litre of NyQuil. (Snoooooooooze) Nice to see Karl again. Oh and HAPPY BIRTHDAY to both Muffin & Hoser. Cool eh? Yo wizkid, give into mailman's desire's and let him get a compressor for the house. Hope ya'all had a good Easter Sunday with your families or wherever. Remember the workshop tomorrow and I'll see many of you at Kids Fair. We have a very packed week, full of events so come on out and check it out. Fischy
