If we're not the Engineers, then who are we now?

I guess the first indication I received of our current identity crisis came over email, in a message that stated something to the effect that the varied names of our institution (Worcester Polytechnic Institute, the University, the Institute, WPI, Worcester Polytech, Tech, etc.) are not a good thing, and that the school will now be known as WPI, except in legal matters, where we are still Worcester Polytechnic Institute. There were two driving forces behind this: the fact that we're not an institute anymore - we're a full-fledged university - and because of that, we're not just polytech anymore. Besides scaring away people from other parts of the globe, the word "polytechnic" no longer accurately reflects what students study at WPI. But as Worcester Mayor Richard Mariano said in his speech at Inauguration, the first name of WPI will always be Worcester.

So the name of the school seems to be pretty well settled. There is a slightly modified letterhead. People are using WPI more often than Worcester Polytechnic Institute. But how far does this go? At Inauguration, you may have noticed another slight modification - in our alma mater. The first line has always been, "Dear Worcester Tech, our Worcester Tech." On Friday, however, the audiance was treated to a song which glorified the city instead of the school: "Dear Wuh-hurcester, our Wuh-hurcester." So what happens to our alma mater as a result of this name change? (I believe that the line, "Come fellows join in our refrain" was also changed a bit, but I'm not positive). At Homecoming, however, the crowd heard the version with the word "tech" - and there were some people who were very adamant about saying the word "tech" even if others were to request otherwise (which they didn't).

So now I'm wondering about another name change. What is the name of our sports teams? For a while, I think they were The Team Formerly Known as the Engineers (kind of like a certain music artist), but I guess the teams are still the Engineers. This is sure to change rather quickly, I'm sure. But what will the new name be? The WPI Goats would be traditional yet grotesque (or goatesque, depending on who you ask). It's going to be hard to come up with a name, since as students we don't really have anything in common - we're not all engineers anymore - and our mascot is a goat. Not that that's a bad thing. In fact, like so much at WPI, it's a unique thing. In fact, it's down-right righteous. It's just not a very good name for a sports team.

Here are some sports teams we could come up with. Before I list them, let me state a disclaimer: we think these names are right, accoring to our research. As the last entry in each of these lists, I submit a WPI equivalent. Okay, first there are the Teams Named After Cool Mascots or Animals. The Yale Bulldogs, the Washington State Cougars, the UConn Huskies, the Carolina Gamecocks, the Florida Gators, the Cal Poly Mustangs, the Arizona Wildcats, the WPI Goats. Then there are Teams Named After Something the Students Have in Common. The Texas A&M Aggies (aggies = agriculturals), the Notre Dame Fighting Irish, the WPI Engineers. Next, we have Teams Named for Local Stuff. The UMass Minutemen, the Nebraska Cornhuskers, the Mississippi Rebels, the WPI Hillclimbers. Finally, we have completely random stuff. The Miami Hurricanes (a rather cool name), the Virginia Tech (or would that be VPI?) Hokies, the WPI... anythings. How about the WPI Phenoms? Other possibilities: The WPI Towers, the WPI Peddlers.

And finally in our rant about names, what is to become of the part of what was once West Street? The whole thing probably won't be known as Freeman Plaza. Maybe an applicable name, for now, would be The Area Formerly Known as West Street. How about The Project That Will Be Done Soon, or maybe, The Area Soon To Be Bricked (although "soon" on this campus in relation to construction projects seems to have an entirely different meaning compared to most people's definition. However, I reluctantly digress). I'm sure they'll either name it after whoever donated lots of money for the project or after someone honorable in WPI history.

Maybe a fitting team name would be the WPI Construction Delays.