The countdown has begun: only seven weeks until graduation. Those of you who are graduating are probably thinking about your freedom, about the end of classes, and about the new beginnings. I know that when I graduated from college (dates aren't important here but it was less than 10 years ago), I was so excited and looking forward to what lay ahead. But I never really did stop and think about what I was leaving behind. This happens quite often; amidst all the excitement and anticipation of graduation, we forget that as well as being a beginning, it is also an ending. The graduation ceremony itself is actually education's ritualization of goodbye, of a transition into the next phase of life. But as individuals, we often don't stop and take the time to say goodbye.
In the four or five weeks before my own graduation, I found myself having a very difficult time concentrating on schoolwork. I also spent a lot of time worrying about who was coming to graduation and if they would all get along. I also found myself fretting about details and plans for the future. Oh, and I spent a lot of time partying. One thing I didn't do, however, was take a look at my deeper - I guess you could say darker - feelings. We all have them when we are leaving someone or something - feelings such as nervousness, fear, sadness and anger. Yet we tend to avoid them - by worrying about other things or distracting ourselves. Although this does provide short-term relief, in the long run it inhibits our ability to grow and learn from our experiences. And oftentimes when we avoid these feelings they make themselves known in other ways, such as in physical symptoms. Headaches, digestion problems, and insomnia can all be symptoms of feelings that we haven't tended to.
But just how do you say goodbye in a healthy way? This is something I am just learning to do myself. And with graduation right around the corner, and the fact that today is my own last day at WPI (I'm leaving for a job opportunity in Boston), I felt that this might be an appropriate time to share with you what I have learned. It is at these times, when we know we are leaving someone or something, that we are lucky - we have an opportunity to think about these things and to say whatever we need to say. We can imagine how our life will be different. For those of you who are graduating from WPI, you have the opportunity to now size up your experience, to contemplate about what you have done here and who you have become. You can ask yourself some of these questions: What have I learned? How have I changed? What has been most meaningful to me? Why? What are my future expectations? Do I have any disappointments or regrets? To whom, specifically, do I want to say thank you? Or goodbye?
It can often be helpful to talk about these things with a friend or a counselor. Or if you prefer, you can write them in a journal. Looking at these questions will help you to learn and make meaning out of your experience here. You can think of it as like the end of a good book or movie, the ones where you just want to - you need to - understand what it was all about. Sometimes the meaning is obvious, and sometimes you need to keep thinking about it again and again. And after you've done all this, I highly recommend you take the time to celebrate. And good luck!
P.S. If you don't mind, I'm going to take this opportunity to say my own goodbye to WPI and to the folks at West Street House. Although I'm excited and looking forward to what lies ahead, I will miss everyone here. It's been a great learning experience and also a lot of fun. So thanks - and bye for now.