If it's not enough to have magazine covers, your parents, the television, and all your peers telling you that you need to improve, in January you face New Year's Resolutions. The pressure is on to lose weight, quit smoking, get better grades, and find a healthy relationship by Valentine's Day. And these are all in addition to the regular things you're supposed to be doing, such as eating three square meals, exercising, and brushing your teeth. Yeah, right.
It's not that self-improvement is a negative thing. On the contrary, it's important to be in control of your life and make changes that are important and/or desirable. But in order to keep from going overboard, here are some thoughts:
Be realistic. No one is going to lose twenty pounds, quit smoking, and find an ideal mate all by February. Changes take time, patience, and often careful planning. And speaking of planning...
Going cold turkey vs. taking small steps. Depending on what your goal is, you'll need to decide whether to do something all at once or to break the goal down into steps. For example, if you want to manage time better, it may be best to concentrate on making three specific changes for one week. After that, you can make adjustments and plan for three new changes. On the other hand, if your goal is to give up soda, you may need to completely give it up all at once or you may find that any amount induces cravings. Going cold turkey vs. taking small steps will partially depend on the particular subject but also on your personality. And speaking of your personality...
Consider why you are making this change to begin with. Is it another excuse to be hard on yourself, or to procrastinate about something else you should be doing? Are you doing it because you're a perfectionist? Are you hoping to find a quick fix for a deeper problem; e.g., hoping that losing weight will make up for all your unhappiness? Make sure you're doing this for the right reasons, namely, that you're trying to do something healthy and positive for yourself. And finally...
Seek the support that you need. Whenever you make any life change, it's helpful to have the support of the people around you. Talk with your friends and family about it, or come to West Street House to discuss your goal with a counselor. We'll help you determine whether or not this goal is healthy for you and, if so, ways to accomplish it.